On Same-sex Relations and Religion

Starting with Christianity, I searched for web site with vested interest in the topic of what the Bible says about same-sex relationships. There are many such pages out there, and I found one here that was well-written and non-argumentative. Across both the entirety of the Old and New Testaments, there are only a handful of places where it's mentioned explicitly, and a few others where it could be read implicitly. Most references are from that massive list of rules, Leviticus. In the New Testament, the topic was aligned to "proper sexual behavior" and so if one follows from Leviticus, same-sex relationships fall outside of there, and so that chunk may apply too. There's some modern discussion around the meaning of the "act" but not the "feelings" to be sinful, but this is one place where language and interpretation fail us. In legal decisions, sometimes it comes down to the specific wording, but I don't think it's the same way with Religious texts.

First off, almost every religious text, and all of the ancient ones, do not have their original words available to us. For those that we do have good original sources for, most of us do not speak the native language the text was written in. And so we have a translation effect added on top of the following discussion.

Religious texts, like any book, are written in specific time periods, and often include specific words or points that are appropriate for their current audience. Not one of any of these authors remotely suspected we'd be pouring over their words with a fine toothed comb thousands of years later. They were writing for their current followers, their current leaders, their modern day peers. In this way, they use the traditional language constructs available to them. If we were writing in America a few years ago, there'd be lots of "he/she" or "his/her" usage that we wouldn't see just 10 years later. We were clearly struggling linguistically at that time with gender equality issues. (Personally, I usually land on using "they" and "them", even when the intent is singular.)

The modern Christian Bible has some things to say about same-sex relations. One can make various arguments as to why it needed to be addressed (ancient taboos, encouraging reproduction), and it doesn't matter too much for this discussion. The words are fairly clearly stated. If a televangelist were writing his gospel today, I guarantee entire paragraphs would be dedicated to this subject, along with reasoning, a list of "do not's", and the appropriate punishments. 2,000 years ago, they clearly didn't think of it with this importance, and they treat the subject largely in passing when making other moral points.

As I read ancient texts such as the Upanishads, and as I read Buddhist teachings from a large range of years, I cannot recall a single sentence spelling out anything explicitly in regard to same-sex relationships. One can extrapolate from this a lack of a view to a position close to the modern progressive striving for all-inclusiveness, especially in the context of Oneness and Love. [n.b. I'm intentionally not counting the stories involving shape-shifting gods here, as the crux of those stories were various moral teachings and examples, and the gender of a specific being at a specific time really didn't matter to the teaching point.] However, there are many references where "wives" are discussed in various ways. When relationships do appear, it's often husband and wife, with traditional gender rolls.

My conclusion is that, based on the above arguments around writing for your audience, and translations across time and languages, these ancient texts were written by men, for men, and drew from their daily lives when needing examples. People in the stories wash in the river and trek through the jungle because that's what they all did in that time period. Or modern day fables of moral examples would have people commuting to work and vacationing in the sun. It's what we do. And back then, if there were literate people to be found, they were largely male. And society was often structured in that more primeval hunter/gatherer model (vs. modern misogyny), where men went out and took care of business while women stayed home to cook and rear children. Thus, when inditing their religious stories to paper, they would write in the role of the husband with a wife, washing in the river, walking through the jungle. The wording for "same-sex partner" would be as unfamiliar to them as the fundamental concept, and so I don't believe they had any reason to contemplate or to write about same-sex relationships. Similarly, even though we who study Buddhist writings are used to pouring over words for deeper meanings (after all, the first paragraph of the introduction to some of Geshe Kelsang Gyatso's books would give you enough to contemplate for a solid week!), when we hear Buddhist teachings that include traditional gender roles, I do not think we need to spend them any mind. And the deeper meaning of that passage lies in other words, regardless of the gender of the participants.

One final thought from the Buddhist side:  In general, attachment to worldly pleasures such as sexual gratification are viewed as distractions on the path to Enlightenment. Given that, there's probably no need to specifically ban same-sex sexual unions when no sexual unions are condoned.

Maybe this is all obvious to everyone, but I had to spend a little time contemplating it. My initial thoughts of "I wonder why the Bible even said anything about same-sex relationships" expanded down this path. Thank you for sharing the thought process, and as always, I would love to hear your thoughts.


Then said he: 'Lo, verily, not for love of the husband is a husband dear, but for love of the Soul (Ātman) a husband is dear.
Lo, verily, not for love of the wife is a wife dear, but for love of the Soul a wife is dear.' 

Upanishads Brih. 2.4.5


"Buddhism has in it no idea of there being a moral law laid down by some kind of cosmic lawgiver." -- Alan Watts

A learning moment?

[No image available for this post because the most appropriate image is one that holds strong negative connotations, so this is a better option.]

I think I had a learning moment yesterday in a realization that slowly dawned on me last night while reading Hesse's Siddhartha in bed. This may be a long wordy post, and it may be a somewhat selfish way to organize my thoughts, but I think and hope my potential insights may be beneficial to others.

Background

I got involved in a FaceBook thread around whether or not the Confederate Flag (more accurately the Battle Flag of Virginia) is a racist symbol. I was quickly outnumbered in this thread with several people defending its use, using the history argument - that it's part of American history and is a symbol of Southern Heritage. My viewpoint is that this Southern Heritage is explicitly tied to racism, which many articles and videos support. It's even a clear conclusion from viewing the Wikipedia page.

I approached the discussion from a rational viewpoint and carefully worded my posts as not to be argumentative. I gave the other participants the benefit of the doubt that they were arguing their position from a non-racist viewpoint. I did have my doubts about this, however. One participant's background image on his FB page looked like a shot from Duck Dynasty, with several bearded white men presenting their middle fingers in an aggressive manner. The person's page on which this thread appeared also showed strong Fox News-leaning tendencies as well, but I wouldn't have called him out on being a racist.

The thread went in strange directions. Many defensive links were posted, all with the same History argument. I pointed out that the swastika dates from neolithic times as a peaceful symbol (yeah, yeah Godwin's Law), but that no one in their right mind would every fly such a flag today. While historically a positive symbol, it was corrupted beyond repair by the Nazi Party. It's even illegal to fly it in Germany except in a museum setting. While nobody is suggesting outlawing the Confederate Flag, those flying it should recognize what a majority of people feel it represents.

Clearly we all disagreed and the discussion wasn't heading anywhere. We all seemed to be reaching a point where the thread had run its course (into a brick wall), and I was ready to let it die. I'm totally OK with not trying to have the last word in these kinds of debates, and it was time just to let it end.

The Escalation

And then my FB friend posted a fresh comment. This was a post shared from Fox News around President Obama's decision to allow private citizens to pay ransom without fear of prosecution. I am not well versed on this point, and I can see at least two sides to that issue. What grabbed my attention was my friend's commentary added to the posted link. It began "Our Muslim President has declared..." and then ranted about this decision.

Right here, I stopped. I made a public comment on this new thread quoting his words and thanked him for letting me put his views on the Confederate Flag in perspective. He is clearly more racist than I had wanted to give him credit for. I don't have any interest in that level of bullshit on my FaceBook feed, or in Real Life, and promptly unfriended him.

He then decided to air this publicly, calling me out by name, which was quickly pointed out to me (after all, we still have many friends in common). Clearly misunderstanding my reason for the abrupt end to our conversation, he called me out on getting "all bent" because of History and Southern Pride. In order to clear this up for him concisely and to close the loop for myself, I messaged him privately letting him know the "Muslim President" comment shows me where he really stands on the flag debate. He has not replied, and I have not further investigated his public airing of his grievance against me. So this is the end, right?

The Aftermath

I found myself in bed, reading, but still thinking about this. If you've read other posts on this blog, or know me at all, I'm very much into the "Be Here Now" philosophy. The past is the past, and there's nothing productive in dwelling on might-have-beens or carrying around past negative events. Yet this exchange kept popping into my mind.

If I was OK with everything I said (I still am - everything was backed up with facts, and I was not argumentative or mean in anything I said), why was this still with me? So I contemplated his side of the events. Was he sitting at home stewing and angry? I've seen and heard how he behaves, especially with alcohol involved, and I know there is a deep streak of anger in this man. I pictured him stewing in anger, feeling persecuted yet again. Maybe he is thinking of me, and pictures me similarly angry and still raving on this? With this thread still in my mind, am I? While contemplating this view, a new thought popped in my mind.

What if he's actually questioning himself? He claims he's not racist, then posts something literally racist. He was seemingly embarrassed enough by my response to on the second thread that he appears to have removed the whole thing. Maybe my pointing this out had some positive effect on him? That would be a great outcome from a pointless debate. Contemplating this, yet another angle came to mind.

The Learning Experience

Maybe he's not questioning anything. Maybe he is just sitting there angry. This, sadly, is the more likely path given my experiences with him. In this case, I've made him angry; I have caused suffering in another living being. Is this keeping me up because I'm ashamed of my actions? But I was trying to do the right thing here, trying to get people to understand the negative connotations associated with a symbol, trying to get them to see the other side of the story. And I'm still confident that I'm on the right side of this debate - history will show that. I was trying to help, and maybe, just maybe, I did.

But... maybe I caused suffering for another living being. Where does that fall in Buddhist teachings? I know well enough that I cannot be the root cause of another's anger - that exists entirely in their mind. However, for one to experience the root delusion of anger, one needs to have an Object on which to exaggerate bad qualities or consider to be undesirable. What if you are that Object to someone else? Is there negative Karma associated with this?

I guess there is always risk in trying to do Good that you will fail. After all, we're all traveling through Samsara together, and if we didn't cause suffering in one another, the amount of suffering in the world may not be enough for us to learn any lessons. Regardless, my take-away here, at this stage in my journey, is learning for myself that what's good for me may not be good for all. I shall endeavor to tread more lightly down these slippery paths where rational debate becomes heated discussion, leading to anger and suffering for someone involved - on either side of the discussion. Once your subject becomes angry, you've lost the ability to teach them anything. If they're angry from the start, having a rational debate is meaningless.

"In a controversy the instant we feel anger we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves." -- Buddha

Anger is all in your mind

A couple weeks ago, this topic came up in my Kadampa Buddhism meditation group. Our leader, James, uses many metaphors and similes when explaining the allegories in the Buddhist teachings. While sometimes his example sounds almost trivial and obvious in restating the principle, this method of repetition at a couple different levels really helps things sink into my head. It's a very positive experience. What follows is a short rambling about Angry Minds. I've thought a good about this the last couple weeks, and think I've developed a better understanding for  myself, which I hope will help others see more as well (duh, that's the whole purpose of this blog!). The examples I may use, however, I can't really take credit for. Some parts may be original, some may come directly from James, but at this point, I've circled these thoughts around so much I couldn't quote sources for any of it. On to the topic.

"Everyone has their triggers." I've heard, and likely said, this line many times over the years. As humans, we've all seen this - usually in others, but probably in ourselves as well. The Triggers I'm talking about here of course are those things that "set us off." That frees the Angry Mind to express itself. Often the result after experiencing a trigger, one is irrationally upset. All the below-the-surface anger they've been keeping a lid on is suddenly released in an outburst. Usually misdirected and entirely out of context. What pushed them over the edge? Their Trigger.

Triggers come in a many forms. Sometimes, they're specific people (or more generally some specific action of a specific person). Like a distant relative or an "ex", that when you happen to cross paths, triggers such anger! All the suffering that soured relationship caused and has been carried around explodes because of the encounter. Other times, triggers could be situational, like heavy traffic or getting unexpectedly stuck in a long checkout line. You're going along through a task, then your speed is suddenly disrupted and you're stuck. You've been able to keep it all together all day, just moving from one task to another, keeping yourself busy and not letting your mind focus on all that crap circling you. But then, stopped. Stuck. And the mind swirls, everything comes to the surface in a grand display. Banging on a steering wheel because your lane just started moving and a car cuts in front. Argh! Or why won't they just open another register! Huffing and puffing, mumbling under your breath, critiquing all the other customers in front of you - who clearly shouldn't be there, in that line, at that time, in front of you.

Maybe I haven't touched on a particular trigger of yours, but you get the point. So we meet the person above, and "everyone knows" that you just keep Mary away from Susan. They had a falling out, and now Susan is "a trigger" for Mary. Or we know the second guy, Rob, who you hesitate to spend time with in a car because you know traffic is "his trigger." He just gets so agitated, you don't want to risk it. But for you? Susan isn't that bad of a person. Sure, Mary and Susan don't get along, but Susan is OK. She has her circle of friends. There's nothing inherently bad about her. And traffic? Sure, it's annoying. Sometimes I end up a few minutes late for a meeting, and sometimes dinner is later than I really hoped it would be. But it's traffic, and not much I can really do it about. I'll wait it out, try to plan better next time. But again, Rob just goes crazy nuts in traffic. Yet there's nothing inherently evil about traffic. It's the occasional cost of having personal transportation.

So what does this all mean in the context of anger being in your mind? Mary get's angry with Susan. Rob gets angry about traffic. But you and I? We can deal with Susan or traffic without any anger. Which means there's nothing specific to Susan or traffic that is related to anger. If there was, we would all be angry with Susan and we'd all be angry sitting in traffic. Yet we aren't. That anger is all in the mind of the one experiencing it. They are expressing an angry mind due to a stimulus that does not inherently cause anger. Because anger doesn't exist in the world. Only in the mind. Imagine if all people could recognize their anger is theirs alone. The things they are angry with, others are not. Which means they have the capacity to also experience it without anger. Just recognize that angry mind, recognize what's causing it, replace it with a peaceful patient mind. If we could each just find that wisdom, all the anger "in the world" would just evaporate. It's not really there anyway, so why pay it any mind?


“If you try to get rid of fear and anger without knowing their meaning, they will grow stronger and return.” -- Deepak Chopra

My current view of how attachment leads to suffering

I've been thinking in circles about attachment recently. I was reaching out for guidance and ran across a definition of non-attachment in The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, which I promptly posted to Facebook with a little comment kind of recognizing I had some work left to be done in this realm. A couple friends commented on this post, which lead to more reflection and thinking.

What follows is my current thinking on attachment with a concrete example. Consider you're planning for an Event. Maybe it's a family outing, or a party, or a trip - it really can be anything, tangible or intangible. For the sake of the example, let's just call it an Event. This hypothetical Event is scheduled for two weeks from now, and it seems like something you would really enjoy. Attachment or Desire can come in here a many different ways, all of which lead to suffering. Specifically, because this Event is something you really want to attend, you naturally look forward to it. You set expectations about how much you'll enjoy it. How do you feel, then, when the Event gets cancelled due to weather or illness? How will you feel if the Event is fun, but doesn't quite live up to your expectations? Or, even if it's great fun and goes off without a hitch, how do you feel when it's over?

Obviously the answer to all those questions is that you don't like it, and you're not happy. The root cause of your unhappiness is your Attachment to the Event. Not the event itself, or the people involved, or anything else - the cause internal to you.

What's the solution then? Like I've written here hundreds of times, it's straightforward: Be Here Now. The present moment is the only one that truly exists. How does this apply to our Event? It's fine to plan for a future experience you'd like to enjoy. Maybe the present moment entails doing some tasks around the planning, but you have to do with non-attachment. Make the calls, send the emails, buy the preparations for the Event, but do these as a current task to take care of. Nothing more. At this point, you've got an event that should bring you joy (why else would you go?) on the calendar, but you have to leave it at that. Then, if the event gets cancelled, the moment you hear of this, allow yourself to feel disappointed in that lack of future joy, but then move on. Similarly, because it's been planned, but not hyped up by your Ego, if you attend and it wasn't the greatest thing ever, you can still find joy in the company of others or in some small aspect of that day. And of course, if it turns out to be the greatest experience of your life, you've set yourself up to be alive and aware in that moment and bask in the momentary happiness. Then when it's over, you move on to the next task.

With this mindset, you're not setting yourself up for failure and suffering.

On to me personally, I can immediately think of three cases in the last week where I've set myself up for suffering. I kind of knew it at the time, but I enjoyed the feeling of excitement in planning and discussing two upcoming events - and I let myself get attached with Desire. Then came the news that both of these events may not occur the way I had hoped they would. And it leaves a hole, a gap. Thankfully, I'm far enough along this journey that I'm not going to try to fill that hole with alcohol or self-pity or blaming others. But it's still something I need to deal with because my Ego got the better of me. The third thing is actually my health. I have been eating better and exercising, and in hindsight, realized that I took my health for granted and became attached to the idea that "I'm a healthy guy".  Then over the course of a couple days I came down with some nasty cold symptoms and also ended up severe shoulder pain. While my shoulder seems to have healed, my ribs ache and I feel raw from coughing for two days straight. I'm suddenly not a healthy guy, and I feel a strong desire to be healthy again. But I can't let a bruised Ego bring me down. Just do the next task, keep eating well, try to fit in some yoga and meditation, treat the symptoms, and I'll heal when I heal.

Living with non-attachment allows one to limit the suffering they experience. It's hard lesson for me, but sometimes I think it's good to be slapped around to remember what's important and get refocused on living in the present moment.


Before satori (enlightenment) you chop wood and carry water. After satori you chop wood and carry water. -- Zen Buddhist saying from Be Love Now.
 

Two Kirtans!

I had the opportunity for two Kirtans this weekend!

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Bhagavan Das lead the first one at a small yoga studio in Towson, MD. We kind of just stumbled upon learning of this one and we braved the ice and snow to attend - it was worth every moment! Many of the kirtans I've attended haven't been quite so full of ritual, but this is the first opportunity I've had to meet someone of this "caliber" in person.

I had a couple major take-aways from this evening, some that I may be able to put into words now. Make no mistake, however, this event touched me deeply, and I will be drawing from that energy for a long time to come.

Towards the end of the concert, Bhagavan Das performed a blessing. At the time, I wasn't sure what was happening, but then we were invited to come up and receive a token. Turns out it was a bowl of flower petals and Hershey kisses. A little about me: I'm a pack-rat. And I rarely eat candy. And so my gut instinct was to hold both of these in reverence and pack them away somewhere safe for as long as possible. But then I realized the scope of the invitation I've been given. This chocolate was specifically blessed for us to "warm our heart" and who was I to deny that? I gave in, and ate the kiss with joy and happiness. I do still have the flower petal and candy wrapper in a baggie, or course ;-)

Through all the high energy and love emanating from that space, it's easy to get lost. In so many ways! Between a couple songs, however, I noticed something. Bhagavan Das was grabbing a drink of water from a bottle and discussing something quickly and quietly with his wife. Through his body motions and hers I suddenly realized... he's just a man. Yes, he has a deep history including nomadic travels in India and meeting many saintly people and receiving training and blessings, and on and on and on. Yet here I caught a glimpse underneath the reverence and ritual of another human being traveling down his path. I'm having troubling communicating this, I think, but the point is that we're all One. All of us. I could be in that body as the holy guru, but he could be me as well - trying to discover the path of enlightenment through all the distractions of modern society. We're all in it together, and this is just the role he's wearing at this time. The feeling of connection was amazing.

At one point I had this external view of the situation - a small warm dimly lit room on a random corner in bustling Towson, surrounded by dark, cold snowy weather outside. Emanating from that little space was so much light and love it's indescribable. I tried to imagine how if everyone in the world would just open themselves up to give and to receive Love, just a little bit, in this way, the amount of suffering out there would drop by orders of magnitude.

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On Sunday, I visited the familiar space of UUCY for a monthly local Kirtan lead by the wonderful John Terlazzo. John is talented in so many ways, it's pointless for me to try to list a biography here, but needless to say I am personally blessed to call John a friend.

About once a month, or as schedules permit, we gather as a group and are lead by John in a cross-cultural spiritual journey through sound (guitar and/or harmonium) and voice (in tune or out), followed up by a vegetarian pot luck. It's a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon! Sometimes the group is as small as 6 of us, but this weekend, even heading into yet another snow storm, there was probably close to 20 there. In fact, there was literally a line outside the door waiting for keys -- someone musingly commented, "you know it's wonderful when people are lined up in the cold for a Kirtan." Indeed!

As usual, this was a beautiful experience. While folks like Bhagavan Das focus strongly on the Hindu traditions of chanting, John brings in a mix of Hindu, Sufi, Sikh, Islam, and God knows what else! The chants flow through the hours like unstoppable ways. Missed words and chords and all, it's all wonderful (I may need to break out the thesaurus!)

And as usual, I was deeply touched several times during the chanting. I'd like to call out one of those little experiences here.

I don't recall the specific piece we were chanting, and it doesn't really matter. Most chants move organically in volume and speed (at least it feels that way, though John may be guiding more than I realize - but it feels like a group energy that we all just follow along). During one cadence, I was completely lost in a chanting meditative state. Again, the specifics aren't key, but this is why I go to Kirtan - for that moment of connected Love or Light or everything. As that energy ran its course through me, I arrived back into my gross mind. My line of thought was something along the lines of "That was great! I wonder if I was even chanting along then, I was so lost. OK, where are we now?" and I'd consciously get myself back in rhythm and tune as the chant continues. I'd re-adjust my legs and my seat, take stock of any aches from my posture, etc. I felt at that moment that I had received what I needed to out of this particular song; I was ready to know which one we'd sing next. I allowed my body to settle back into the chanting in a refreshed posture, and got my groove back on. And then it happened... I was lost again. I wasn't done after all! Again, my words are failing me. I think the take-away here is that when you've opened up your heart to give and receive all you have, never think you're done with anything! There's always more goodness, just waiting its turn to flow through you next.

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Alright, this has been a babbling unstructured post. Even if you read this and think "what a bunch of nonsense from some America hippie" I have to recommend exploring Kirtan, holy chanting, and this realm of music. It's easy to get started:  just pull up Pandora and find Bhagavan Das, Krishna Das, Jai Uttal, Snatam Kaur -- or countless others. Listen to a few songs here and there, and start looking around your community (often at yoga studios) for a chance to experience it first-hand. It could change your life forever in a positive direction - who wouldn't jump at such an opportunity? The next step is yours, my Friend. Open up to Love and Be Love. It really is that easy.

Of all the things that exist,
we breathe and wake and turn it into song.
 -- Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening

Ottawa Trip

I spent a few days in Canada this week. Taking a break from some of my more heartfelt serious posts lately, I'd like to post about some observations from my trip to Ottawa, Ontario. I was in town to visit the office of a company that my company acquired a year ago. They're just now getting integrated, and it's a product line I wasn't very familiar with, so welcomed the opportunity to learn directly from them face to face.

Units

Canada uses metric, and the US uses archaic imperial units. As an engineer and scientist, I am familiar with many metric units. That is, I know 30 degrees C is hot weather and I have a good feel for centimeters. I can do some conversions quickly; for example  F=2*C+30 roughly (good enough for non-scientific work) and 1 Gallon is a bit less than 4 Liters. That's great when you're in conversation, but I found my brain is securely fixed in imperial units.

When I hopped in the car Tuesday morning, the gal on the radio said the temperature was "minus 25". (oddly they don't say "negative 25" as we do in the States). I couldn't immediately translate this to F, but I knew it was DAMN COLD!

Extending on this, the next night the unitless forecast was "-20 and 2-4 of snow". In metric, this is pretty darn cold, but only a bit of snow (2.54 cm is an inch). But in imperial units, if it was -20F outside and  you're getting 2-4 inches of snow, it's a much worse world!

I had to refill the rental car with fuel on the way back to returning it. Gasoline costs about 1 CAD / Litre. I have absolutely no idea how much that really is. The CAD to USD conversion is close, but fluctuates, and I don't have a good feel at all. While I like the nice round number of $1/L, it felt fairly expensive to me at the time. Turns out, it's really close to current prices in the States, a bit under $US 3/gallon.

So I was entertained by my complete lack of real-world unit conversions between metric and my imperial-based brain. (Plus I really like writing the word Imperial since it makes me think of Darth Vader sitting in a committee meeting defining units.)

Politeness

Canadians are renown the world over for being a polite people. I found no exceptions here in Ottawa. When driving, most people used turn signals, slowed down to allow others to merge, pedestrians followed the signals at intersections -- it was quite nice. Although I was warned by a local that this doesn't follow through all of Canada. Apparently drivers in Montreal are just as bad as in the US.

I ate dinner a couple nights at a bar, a lunch at a Tim Hortons, and dinner at the airport. All of the servers were more than friendly. The counter gal at Tim's had a heavy north-African accent and was very apologetic. We had some challenges communicating, not just because of her accent but because of the Canadianisms too. I had no idea what "double-double" meant when she was asking about my coffee. Turns out it means two sugars, two creams. I like my coffee black, and it was an entertaining thing as it seems this is a popular choice up north. Regardless of our difficulty talking to each other, it was a very friendly and kind two minutes.

The patrons at these establishments were also very kind from their interactions with each other (making sure people had seats and enough space) to striking up general conversations with strangers. Maybe I just met some nice folks and that isn't the total norm, but I'm happy to stereotype in this positive manner. I have traveled regularly all across the US and often sit in silence next to grumpy fellow travelers and deal with disgruntled servers just waiting for their next smoke break. It's a refreshing change of pace.

Cultural Mix

I was surprised by the international feel of downtown Ottawa. Many people were bilingual in French and there was an incredible mix of "minorities". I am not educated on the racial heritage mix of the area, but had presumed Canada to be full of Caucasians. This was an erroneous assumption on my part and found a very wide mix of skin colors and accents. Maybe that's just part of being in a city, although Ottawa isn't exactly a huge city.

The Girls

Something stood out to me with women's fashion in this area. Even in freezing weather, many women still wore skirts with leggings. It appears that wildly patterned and styled leggings is a "thing" up there. A broad mix of boots/shoes, leg warmers/skinny jeans, etc. was easily observable around town. When you wander NYC or Chicago in the winter, it seems everyone has the same dress code -- long black coat and the warmest thing you find in your closet. It was unexpected to see such flair in women's winter fashion, as well as an apparent complete disregard for the temperature.

The Highlander Pub

To get a little specific, I have to recommend this place if you're ever in town. Their vegetarian food options weren't anything to write home about (but it's a Scottish themed bar, including kilts, and Scotts aren't really known for their vegan dishes!), but the service, the beer, and their selection of Scotch was absolutely fantastic.

Here's a link to their website: www.thehighlanderpub.com, which includes pictures of the bar. If you enjoy Scotch, sit at the bar and have a chat with Dave the bartender. He really knows his stuff to a T. On both evenings, once I made a selection, he turned around, thumbed through some random book on the shelf, and handed me some written details on that specific Scotch. His knowledge is unsurpassed in my experience. I really enjoyed a 12 year old Arberlour, but had some difficulty describing it. The adjectives Dave pulled out were spot on regarding the flavor, the body, and the after taste. Further, he's just a downright pleasant guy and very chatty when he wasn't running around keeping everyone satisfied.


In all, I had an enjoyable few days visiting our office up there. I kind of hope to get back there again, but preferably in the summer months. Direct flights are limited, and I drove 2 hours south to Dulles for a direct flight. I won't be doing that again, and in fact will likely just drive the 7 hours next time. In the end, it works out pretty much as a wash in terms of time and cost - plus then I'll have my Jeep up there for the snow!

A Heart Full of Love

Have you ever had that feeling? It can come from many places, but only if you give yourself the opportunity. My personal experiences of this feeling have greatly multiplied over the last year. They have come from events like meditation, singing Kirtan, holding or talking to a child, spending quiet time with someone you care about, watching a sunrise/sunset or even just driving down the road. But you have to be open to receive it. 

The feeling I'm talking about one is where your heart literally feels full. Like there's not enough space in your chest to hold it. It's a feeling of deep connection and resonance between your inner self and the rest of creation. It's a feeling of openness too. Like your heart is directly connected to something else, something greater than you. This isn't quite traditional American emotion love of another individual. That's a more specific feeling, different from this one. When you love a Significant Other, for example, you may be willing to take risks to protect them, to share deep inner thoughts with them, to feel a solid connection based on shared experiences. But that's different and more narrow than what I'm talking about here. Opening yourself up to another person may be a good start, but it's not the end point - you need to open yourself up to everything, to nature, to the world, to the Universe. 

Verily, I cannot find the words to express it more clearly. I hope that you have had the opportunity to experience this at least once in this life so far. It's painful to think that many people out there have never grasped this feeling.  Holding a peaceful mind and a compassionate heart allows you to find this experience in more places and more readily, in my experience.

I do know for certain that there are actions that make this feeling simply impossible. Some examples:

• Being angry - anger at another person or events precludes any possible positive inner emotions to be realized
• Being unkind - differentiated from anger, because you can be unkind in your actions even if you're not angry
• Violence - I am willing to bet not a single human on this planet has held love in their heart during an act of violence. You cannot aim to injure another living being in the name of Love. If you can hold a gun in your hand and feel Love, you have some serious issues that need to be resolved. There may be feelings of power and dominance that narrow minded people attribute to love, but this is self-loving. And one of the causes of personal suffering. 
• Revenge - If another has harmed you or someone you love, revenge is a common modern reaction. "You hurt mine, so I shall hurt you." This is folly. Additional pain and hate does not heal or resolve the initial action. This is a viscous cycle and nothing to do with Love. 
• Over-indulgence - This could cover many things from drinking and drugs to money and physical possessions to sexual or other personal gratification. Yes, there are use cases, in my opinion, where partaking in these events is harmless. Alcohol and mild drugs can ease social tensions and temporarily relieve personal suffering. Most everyone in a modern society needs some money and possessions. Sex and some selfish acts are obviously fun and lead to temporary happiness. The over-indulgence or uncontrolled attachment is where the problems start.

When the true goal is the end of suffering and helping every living being find eternal happiness, these are roadblocks and distractions. One must aim to live their life in harmony with nature and other living beings. This brings you closer to feeling, as best as we can in these temporary earthly bodies, that resonance and connection of the vibrations of the Universe hidden from our plain sight. 

Realize, too, that you don't need to be sitting on a beautiful warm beach watching the sun rise to achieve this ecstatic feeling of Love. You can find it driving down the road, being in tune with the present moment, with the Now, and viewing the leaf-less trees on a bitterly cold winter day. But you have to be personally open and available to receiving it. Then when it strikes.... Oh my! What joy and happiness! Tears well up in your eyes, your heartbeat quickens, and the vibrations of the Universe pass freely through you. Ecstasy. It's available all the time. You just need to put aside the angry mind, the fear and hate preached by so many vitriol people in this world. World peace starts with inner peace. Loving Everyone starts with Loving Yourself.

 

A little tangent here as I was working through these thoughts:  I am not Christian, and many of the words I've used above are from Eastern traditions and not modern Christianity. However, I firmly believe true Christians think of this experience in a similar way. These people are Christians who look to the words and teachings of Jesus in the New Testament and other resources to find the message of Light and Love he consistently preached. Very little of this can be found in the Old Testament world of a vengeful and controlling supreme being. There primary tools in the Old Testament is fire and brimstone, fear and revenge. And the "Christians" who pull from such sources to argue against science, who expound hateful messages against people who are different from them, who self-righteously claim they are due to inherit the kingdom of heaven while shoving anyone else to the side, these are not people of Light and Love. These are not true Christians. These are people full of self-love and are only increasing suffering in the world around them. And they will never find their heart so full of Love that they just need to sit for a moment and weep in happiness. I feel sorry for them.

“The moment you understand yourself as the true Self, you find such peace and bliss that the impressions of the petty enjoyments you experienced before become as ordinary specks of light in front of the brilliant sun.” -- Swami Satchidananda, The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali

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