Mozzarella Sticks on a Burger

I just saw an advertisement for cheese sticks as an optional topping for a hamburger. At what point in  your life do you think, "I'd like to eat a slab of ground beef, possibly made up of hundreds of different cows, between two hunks of processed flour, but that's not enough!"? Sure, you can pretend it's healthy because it's got a couple hunks of GMO hot house tomatoes on there and you're washing it down with chemical-laden diet soda, but America's fascination with hamburgers is surely one of the key ingredients to an unhealthy diet. And now the idea is to top off this sandwich with 400 calories of fried cheese? Nice job of marketing Sheetz! Ugh.

Where is the "ALL" box?

Where is the choice for "All" ?

Dating websites provide you a drop-down box to select your religion. This is understandably often a key part of someone's world view, and so is important in match-making. The list shown here is from POF, but they're all pretty similar. Most include Atheist and Agnostic along with a broad list of world religions, and usually a breakdown for various flavors of Christianity. Some will include things like "New age" shown here, but sometimes also Wiccan or Pagan. And of course, there is the ever-popular "Other".

But where is the option for "All"?

We're all one. It's all the same dance, man. Why can't we all just see that?

We humans just need to see it. Or remember it - I think many of our ancient ancestors got this right. If we could only drop the Ego and desire to be Right. Poof! So many human  world problems disappear instantly.

Then we could all just stand and look at each other and ask, "what were we fighting about?"

Ancient Egyptians had it right

I just realized the ancient Egyptians got it right.

As a child, I was fascinated by mummies - as many children are. I remember being put-off and confused when I learned about the mummification process. They essentially disregarded the brain - using hooks inserted through the nose to pull it out in pieces. I was shocked at their disrespect for this major organ - after all, a person could survive with just their head left hooked to machines. How could they not see the importance? Yet they took much care of other organs, storing them in canopic jars alongside the body.

My viewpoint changed entirely today. Something caught my ear in a video, then I did a little digging. As a result, I've done a 180 and can finally understand why they did this.

First off,  no, they didn't regard the brain highly - it was just another piece of internal flesh that needed to be removed to prevent rot and decay. Other organs that would decompose (liver, lungs, stomach) were all removed carefully, washed and packed. Yet the heart was not removed. They believed that the heart was the center of the body, the center of intelligence and feeling, and the dead would need this in the afterlife. And so they left the heart in tact and in the body.

Mindfulness as a state of being is wonderful. And an open mind allows one to traverse the various aspects of different cultures with wonder instead of fear. But to live well and act righteously? That takes an open heart. The Egyptians had it right thousands of years ago.

Barriers

Consider any person and the emotional barriers they have around them. I'm picturing concentric circles. The closest is a high stone wall, almost a tower. This is their innermost protected self (their ego's space). But around that are several, much smaller walls or even fences. Each layer is purposefully harder to get inside of, or penetrate. Strangers mill around outside the furthest fence, but it usually doesn't take much to get inside one level. To get inside the innermost is reserved for very close life-long friends and mates. There's a fundamental challenge here of course in that everyone milling around in your layer of walls each have their own walls. When you're both in the equivalent circles of each other, things are fine. But there's a risk of heartache and pain if the levels don't match up. If Jane lets John into her innermost level, but John doesn't allow her into his, there will be suffering eventually in that relationship. There's also only so much space available at that innermost level. Too many people there, they compete for your heart strings, and the ego can't keep everything under control.

Now picture a person without all those walls. Call him Wall-Less Guy. He's got just a single fence out there, and many people can be held inside. Once inside, they can migrate and orbit as they need to - sometimes very close (they've let him into their inner wall) and sometimes further out. But it's fluid within that space, and there are no additional walls to climb to get closer. There's a challenge here as well. Maybe several. First, there's still a finite amount of "close" space (there's only so much time in a day and days in a week). Second, the others out there still have their walls. So even though they have the opportunity to move closer, Wall-Less Guy may still need to climb their walls or allow opportunity for the walls of others to open to him. Finally, and this one gets tricky, is the perception of walls that aren't there. Everyone is used to life where you have to navigate around, between, and over each other's walls. There's an implicit assumption that everyone has walls. Now you meet Wall-Less Guy and cannot figure him out. He is often told that he's "tough to read" and nobody can figure what he's really thinking. But that's only because you think he's got sturdy walls in place, keeping you blocked out from the sacred inner courtyard. You're already there - stop looking for walls.

It can get more interesting when two Wall-Less Guys meet. The outer fence is easily breached, and then you're there. You can share freely, move in and out of each other's lives with ease - close when you need to be, but at arm's length when you don't need to feed off each other's energy. Imagine how grand life would be if everyone could get past that Ego that builds the Walls and just experience each other without the Barriers.

"As you get closer to your true self, you begin to sense that you are part of everything. Boundaries soften and disappear." -- Deepak Chopra

I'm back!

I haven't posted here since 2008. A lot has changed in my life in the last 6 years. That's probably an understatement and a half!
I am now divorced and living on my own, still in York PA. Over the last year, I have migrated my relationships from "our friends" (as many married couples end up with) to "my friends". I've had the good fortune to meet some wonderful people who have helped greatly in getting me out of my "just waiting for stuff to happen" phase I was in for the last decade or so. As part of that, I have invested in my own personal spiritual journey with gusto.
I wondered about creating a new blog space, but then fell across this old one. There are some real gems in the old stuff here, and I so no real good reason to dump it all and start again. I have been doing a lot of writing and journaling this summer - and I need a better place to post this stuff than Facebook. While I like my little Facebook soapbox, it's kind of limited in many ways. When I post funny quips and such, I'll get dozens of likes and some comments. When I post political things, I'll get a few likes and sometimes dozens of comments - as they often escalate, bordering on arguing. But when I post my deeper philosophical thoughts, I don't think anyone reads them. Now it's not much more likely people will read things here - but at least it's searchable by Google and public, not limited to my couple hundred friends (at least those who haven't hidden my yet).
I'm writing and posting this July 23, 2014. I have several pieces I've written in the last couple months that I am reposting, and back-dating some to the dates when I initially wrote them.
If you happen to stumble across this, I hope you find something of interest and enjoy your reading. Thank you.

Grocery Shopping and Being Them

As I pulled into Weis, I decided to do my "Be them" thing. This is a practice I've been trying lately where I try to "be" the people I encounter. Not to try to "think like them" or "see them" or "see your life as them". But to really BE them. Feel their clothing on you, note where their focus is, consider their ego. I do this by walking blissfully through the store with my heart open, as wide as I can open it. I can physically feel the difference in my chest when I think like this. It feels good. So I trek through the parking lot, going down the journey as One with Everyone.

The overweight lady carrying bags of ice
The old man with three prescription bags in his hand
The overdressed lady waiting at the deli counter
The picky person at the strawberries
The kid who just can't stand still
The cashier hustling back to the lounge on break
The lost and wandering balding guy
The 20-something texting, standing in the checkout line

Be them. Get in there and do it. With an open heart feeling love. Feel that link with everyone!

As I stood in the checkout line, I started doing some reflecting on the last 20 minutes. I realized very clearly that I do this exercise with my heart and chest. I wonder if I could do it instead with my third eye, my Ajna? My meditation today was around opening it wider, trying to cleanse the pineal gland. I can feel that sensation too. Like a steady pressure on your forehead - like someone is pushing with their fingertip. I want work on this and try again with my focus there instead of my heart.

Open Borders

Thinking about the border - it hit me that totally open may be the best solution. A clear path for good-faith immigrants, easy passage for those that want to travel back and forth. With normal, good people able to pass freely, then the border patrols can focus on the actual illegal activities around drug/gun smugglers and trafficking. From this article's conclusion, "if you want a secure US-Mexico border, one where law enforcement can focus on rooting out murderers and smugglers, you need open borders". Makes a lot of sense.

What's the downside? It's all about perspective. The loud "secure the border" cries here are the typical compassion-less cries of fear from the Right. They have all this "national pride" simply because their mother happened to give birth on them on American soil. Their lack of empathy to anyone and everyone born anywhere else is appalling on a basic human level. And then you have people like Ann Coulter spewing her typical hate in the misguided name of politics because of the fear that immigrants tend to vote Democrat instead of Republican. It's all about the agenda and has nothing to do with doing what's right for humans.

On Death

My mom's half-sister, Aunt Gin-Gin to me, passed suddenly early Sunday morning due to a heart attack. Her husband of 50 years (they met when she was 7 years old) passed 5 years ago, and they say she was never quite the same after. I have only the fondest of memories of her, and in spending time at the viewing, that's all anyone had to say. She will be missed. But this got me thinking about Death again. I came up with the following, although I think it probably needs some refining or editing. I hope my point comes across.

On Death
Our culture is permeated with a fear of death. Yet it's a natural part of the cycle. It's even a required part of the cycle. The fear of ones own death usually hides behind their mundane daily thoughts and activities. With the death of a loved one, that fear comes rushing to the top, clouds out everything else, and we mourn. This is literally a form of personal suffering. There is a hole that person leaves behind, and it's natural to desire to fill that hole. They have already moved on, so this is a challenge only for the living. Yet when you're suffering, you're not living. The Second Noble Truth of Buddhism tells us that desire is the cause of suffering. What is that root desire in this case? The desire to re-live past times that you hold in your memory. The desire to enjoy future events with a person no longer with us. These desires cannot be satiated, and so we suffer. But it doesn't have to be that way. You're living, here and now. Let those positive memories flow through you, revel that you were able to enjoy them, and then let it go. That is the past, you're living here and now. Put down those expectations you had of sharing future birthdays, graduations, weddings. That's all in the future. There will be happy times ahead that will again fade to happy memories. But to enjoy them, you need to be living, here and now. Worrying about the future doesn't change the future. Let that desire flow through you, and flow away. You're loved one may have left you for now, and that's sad. But don't let it stop you from living and enjoying the present moment with your fellow souls still here. To do that, you have to let go of the fear of the cycle. No one ever contemplates the time before your own birth with fear, and so the time after your own death need not be feared either. Everyone's life is just a series of present moments, and that's where true happiness exists, in the here and now. Memories of the past have guided you to the present moment, don't waste it worrying about future moments. So share the stories. And share the memories. And know that we'll all travel to the future together, and we will all find happiness there too. Share the love, and the light, of the living in celebration, not in mourning. Be here now.

Videos to Watch

I strongly encourage you to set aside some time and watch the following:

Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds – Part 1: Akasha (2012)
Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds – Part 2: The Spiral (2012)
Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds – Part 3: The Serpent and the Lotus (2012)
Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds – Part 4: Beyond Thinking (2012)

They're about 30 minutes each and worth every second.

Caterpillar to Butterfly

Ram Dass has a couple pages on Caterpillars and Butterflies in Be Here Now and his other works. There was a quote that stuck with me for several days: As long as he's busy being a caterpillar he can't be a butterfly.

Obviously, there's more to the point Dass was making, but this phrasing stuck in my head. I've thought for a long while that I'm in the "butterfly" stage of my life. My kids are the caterpillars to support into their adulthood.

I'm starting to realize I'm still a caterpillar. Maybe the kids are larvae still? There is much for me to learn. Maybe the realization of this is the beginning of the chrysalis stage?

I did a little research (I'm still an engineer, after all). So I looked up the life stages of a butterfly:
Egg 3-5 days,
Larva 5-10 days,
Chrysalis 7-10 days,
Butterfly 14 days.
Total lifespan from egg to elderly butterfly is 68 days. So now let's map this to a human time scale. Keeping the math simple, let's set our elderly butterfly to 85 years. That means 1.25 butterfly days = 1 human year. So when does the "butterfly stage" start? 42.5 years.

I will turn 42.5 on August 1, 2014.

Time to let go of my caterpillarness.

Life and Death Musings

At my Men's Group meeting this morning, the conversation was largely about how we view death, lead by Rich. Bob told us how mom is very near the door, and ready to go. Matt told a story about his mother, and how he signed off on not to keep her alive with "tubes." The doctors wanted to put antibiotics or something directly into her heart, but said he told them no, as this was against her wishes. But then they asked about just putting them in the IV then. He relented, acknowledging this was essentially against her wishes, but said OK. And then she was very alive and laughing the next day.

All this talk reminded me of my daughter at my paternal grand father's funeral where she said: "Why is everyone sad? It's not like he's gone."

We come into the world alone and leave it alone. In the middle we're social animals. But I don't think I see things this way. At the beginning (and often at the end I think), we're very close to the veil. We're probably more alone in the world being "social humans" than we are at the start or the end.

There's a Chinese Proverb I should look up for details. It's about a man falls down a well with a dragon at the bottom, but he grabs a branch. As he's hanging there, there are two mice (white and black) sawing through the branch. There's also a drop of honey. The moral seems to be that in our materialistic society: "We're all just licking the honey". However, I see this almost completely the opposite way, in terms of the "be here now" view. I feel much less materialistic. Maybe a little more hedonistic, but less materialistic. If you can let go of your ego and your fate, and just be here now, why not have a lick of honey?

Rich presented another poem, Kahil Gibran On Death.

You would know the secret of death.
But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life?
The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light.
If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.
For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.

Being Here and Now

Be Here Now - I realize how this mantra has to permeate every moment.

I stand there, getting out of the shower and toweling off. I know I have phone messages waiting for me. I need to open the 3rd floor window. I need to sweep the living room for company. I need to check the movie list. I need to go buy food. But right now? I'm drying myself off. I'll get to all that other stuff when I get to it. Thinking about it doesn't matter - I'll see the messages soon. The living room will still be there. Just be here now.