Tyson (Mike, not the chicken)

I'm not a boxing expert. I wouldn't even really call myself a fan. But I do enjoy occasionally staying up for a decent, hyped HBO fight once in a while. I know a few of the names, especially the heavyweights, and enjoy watching a good fight. With that said:

I turned on HBO tonight to see "Boxing: 2006: Corey Sanders vs. Mike Tyson" (in high def). First, I had no idea this wasn't a very recent thing, but it was from Oct 20, 2006. It was just an exhibition fight against a 300lb punching bag wearing headgear. Basically a huge waste of 20 minutes.

I can't say I was ever a Mike Tyson fan. He was so hugely popular, you had to love to hate him. Rooting against him was kind of silly for a while though -- those punches were among the hardest ever in the sport. Plus, he was the youngest champ ever. So credit where credit is due, the guy is tough. But he's also a rapist. And to boot, he was found with like 30 pounds of pot and coke. That's 30 pounds. These are drugs people buy by the gram. If you're a hardcore smoker, maybe you buy a "qp" = quarter pound (4 ounces) to sell to your friends. He was busted with 30 pounds. I know he's a big guy, but c'mon. Some of my fraternity brothers were big guys too. And a quarter ounce could get a good number of your friends baked. Anyway, where was I? Oh, he's also an ear biter. That goes beyond dumb. He didn't get into a bar fight with Holyfield -- it was a scheduled, real boxing match. They were professional fighters, doing what they do professionally. And he bit the guy's ear. Took a chunk right out. There's a chemical imbalance going on there. Did I mention he's also a rapist?

So WTF is this guy doing on my TV at 10 pm at 40 years old fighting a lardass in what should have been a gym fight, not a pay-per-view event. Of course, I never heard about this to start with, so clearly it wasn't that huge of a deal. It went the scheduled 5 rounds, with Iron Mike landing a few good ones. But a waste of 20 minutes. And I justed wasted 10 more writing this. Hopefully you read faster than I write :>

But a little more: my fondest memory of Mike Tyson is really Mike Tyson's Punch Out for the original Nintendo (NES). I spent a lot of time kick Glass Joe's ass, but between my brother and I playing on a 13" TV at the end of our dining room table, we did eventually get to Mike himself. Like most video games, it's really just learning enough of the secrets so you can get to the next level. No. Wait. That's Scientology. Video games too, though. With the right amount of patience, anybody can fight their way through and the finally kick Mike's ass too. Then there was the way that most 30+ year old guys could rattle off like their first girlfriend's phone number: 007 373 5963. I doubt the NES would ever have been as popular as it was without cheat codes. I'm kind of glad I don't know anything like this for my XBox 360 games.